Learn what to do when you lapse, cheat, slip, or fall off your diet

We've all had lapses (aka cheats, slips, falling off) during a diet. A lapse can be seen as a failure, a real crisis. It can also be seen as an opportunity. Researchers in the field of relapse prevention have found that the most dangerous period is the time directly following the lapse. Here are six things recommended by experts that you can do right after a lapse.
Stop, look, & listen Pay attention to what's happening. The lapse is a warning sign. Take yourself away to a quiet spot so you can get yourself together.
Stay calm You'll be upset at first, and that's okay. But remember, this is just a slip, not a total relapse.
Strengthen motivation Instead of giving up, think back over why you want to lose weight. Remember your goal and what it will bring to your life. Consider the strides you've already made.
See what led up to the lapse Carefully consider the situation surrounding the cheat. That will tell you about what in your life you need to attend to.
Make a plan of immediate action Get rid of any food tempting you at the moment. Get yourself away from the kitchen or the restaurant, or if possible, wherever the slip occurred. See if you can do something for yourself at this juncture that will be an alternative to eating.
Ask for help - from friends, family etc. You'd be surprised how much people who care about you can do (encouragement, suggestions, support)

My thoughts ....
Stop, look, & listen Hard to wander off when lapse is at home. But I threw away extra bars. It was a storm eat. I couldn't stop myself.

Stay calm This is just a slip. This is just one day. I am standing on the top of a balance beam. I am about 1/3 of the way across. I am looking back, and off to the sides. It is a long way down and I'm scared I'll fall. I need to look straight ahead, to the end of the beam. Look at my destination. Not look at the ground I've covered as I feel unsteady looking backwards over my shoulder. And not look down as I feel like I a going to fall. I need to look straight ahead.One step at a time.

Strengthen motivation I am going to put my arms out for balance, and look straight ahead. Take one step at a time. I need to lose weight for my health. I have already lost so much weight, and I stayed on task during some very stress-filled days! I can do this. I love how I feel in ketosis, in control & excited to see the scales moving down.

See what led up to the lapse Bars were on table. I had not planned my meals. I've been getting slack about that, as well as about using fitday. DH was around (off schedule) I had no protein powder to fill myself up with. (has worked in past)

Make a plan of immediate action I threw away extra bars. Trash put outside too. Drank some glasses of water. Did not eat dinner. Not hungry. Stopped whipping myself and beating myself up. Need to not have this sort of stuff in house EVER! Need to sort out food plan for next few days. Need to order some protein powder FAST.

Ask for help I decided to think about things and write my thoughts down. It wasn't enough 'during' the lapse to think of all the reasons for not cheating. My mind wasn't interested in that conversation! I know I cannot do this alone. So that is why I am here .....

The Good Cheat

For people who are trying to change a behavior, it almost never goes smoothly. There are bumps in the road, places where you may slip backward for the moment. Slipping back into old patterns while you are trying ever so hard to do things differently is to be expected and even welcomed. As human beings, we simply do not learn without trial and error, without making mistakes.

Cheating on your diet provides you with a chance for critical learning. A study reported in the Journal of Applied Psychology showed that when students were encouraged to make errors and then learn from those errors, they outperformed students who were simply taught how to do things the exact right way. The findings in this study show how making mistakes helps people learn to plan, monitor and revise their strategies for solving problems—a perfect recipe for success.

Slips are an integral part of the process of change. If you are dieting, a slip can teach you a great deal about how to change your eating patterns. You can use a cheat as a power tool, especially if you are willing to think about it and not just beat yourself up over it. You can carefully consider how it happened, why it happened, and you can use that knowledge to create a plan that will be better for you in the future.

Here's how.

Find a relaxed time after your cheat. Take a paper and pencil and write your answers to the following:

How was I feeling before I cheated on my diet?
Was I reacting to something?
Have I reacted that way before?
Do I react that way in other areas of my life?
Would I say this is a pattern with me?
Have I ever found a way to break this pattern?
How did I feel about breaking my diet?
Do I have confidence in my ability to do something different?
Is there a high-risk cheating situation coming up for me within the next week?
Write out five strategies that you can use to help you deal with the high-risk situation you anticipate.

These are steps in the right direction. By taking these steps, you will be learning new behavior. This is the way to break your habit of cheating on your diet. You will begin to achieve a number of small successes and this will build your confidence, even if you still have moments when you fail. Over time, you will have fewer and fewer slips.

Practice the 10 steps outlined above and you will be able to use cheating as a tool for permanent change. You will be taking hold of a cheat and using it to your advantage. This will give you invaluable emotional and thinking skills that will support you every step of the way to your weight loss goal.

Success in any endeavor does not depend on doing everything right. Success has much more to do with what happens when things don't go just right. Learning from your diet mistakes will sharpen your problem solving techniques.

Use the steps, and lose the weight you want to lose. Try it—it really works.

©2007 Maria's Last Diet. Maria’s Last Diet is an online weight loss support website for women. At Maria’s Last Diet, you’ll find the tools to fix the thoughts, feelings, and automatic habits that fight against you when you diet. Because it’s never just about the food. Visit www.mariaslastdiet.com for more diet tips and weight loss motivation.

Highway Speech

I was reading on the Kimkins forum today and found the following analogy which was worth sharing:

So you 'cheated' or ate off plan? Think of it like this: You accidently took an off ramp on the highway. Then you hit a red light or stop sign. There might even be some road construction. Either way your journey just got slowed. Now you have to travel beside the highway looking for the on ramp. You will see all the other cars speeding by merrily. You will wish that you were on that highway. But you have to keep driving. When you find the on-ramp it might be a little congested and you have to patiently wait your turn. Then when you see the opening you need to pull ahead with speed and determination and DON'T LOOK BACK at that on-ramp. AND before you know it you are traveling at full speed toward your goal. Try to get in the middle lane and not to close to that outside lane, lest you accidently take the off-ramp again! Get it?

I love it! Great imagery. Right now, I am looking for the on-ramp. You know what, I am really appreciating where people have journalled their cheats, their detours, so honestly. Because it's helping me accept that I am not the only person who takes the exit ramp miles and miles before she planned to. And these ladies went on to lose more and more pounds!!!

Do You Know How to Cheat and Still Reach Your Weight-Loss Goal?

Cheating on a diet is one of the most crucial aspects when it comes to success or failure. If you can handle those inevitable lapses, you will be overcoming an important obstacle. It is in this area of mistakes—cheats—where dieters' attempts can live or die.

Do you have what it takes to turn a cheat into a tool for success? Take this quiz and find out.

Can you pick up and go on with your diet after a cheat?
Do you stop to consider the circumstances surrounding a cheat?
Can you accept yourself as not being perfect on a diet?
Do you forgive yourself for a lapse?
Can you keep one cheat from leading you to another?
Do you believe that personal change is a process?
Do you think you will still be able to change the way you eat, even though you cheat sometimes?
Do you think mistakes are part of learning something new?
Can you avoid feeling like a failure because of a slip?
Do you think that changing your behavior might take more than one attempt?
Can you hold on to your self-confidence, even after a cheat?
Can you forgive yourself for having less willpower at times?
Do you know how to include dealing with cheats in your weight-loss plan of action?
Can you avoid going on to the next diet just because of a cheat?
Can you avoid feeling guilty about a lapse?
Can you view a cheat as a small thing and not a catastrophe?
Do you know how to learn about yourself from your cheats?
Do you pay attention to what you do after you cheat?
Can you keep one cheating episode from turning into a total pig-out?
Do you still have hope after a cheat?

If you have more YES answer than NO answers, your chances of sticking with it are very good, even though you cheat sometimes.

If you have more NO answers than YES answers, you may be in danger of letting a cheat lead to a total collapse of your diet. Work on understanding your cheating episodes as much as possible—when they happen, why they happen, how often they happen. Use this knowledge and you won't have to give up just because you cheat.

©2006 Maria's Last Diet

Bloated

Goodmorning everyone. I am feeling very stiff & sore this morning after the weightlifting I did Wednesday night. Ouch! Also I'm feeling very bloated which is not helping the scale. If anyone is tempted to cheat - beware - although getting back to eating is easy, persuading your body to rid itself of the excess water is harder. I still feel like I keep putting down the first domino. I need to get another one to sit on top!

I am floundering a little this morning, especially feeling as bloated as I am - but I am trying hard to be steady and realistic. Thankfully I've been on plan for a couple of cycles and think that TOM might also be affecting how I am feeling. Last month was only a 22 day cycle for me, and if this month is another short cycle, this is the dreaded "week before". I have noticed that I am not feeling so much in control of my hunger & satiety (as happens with TOM approaching). Not sure if this is me trying to get back into ketosis, or not, but this "extra" bloat is making me want to shift the blame a little more in TOMs direction. Either way, I am persevering. I have come this far ....

Confessions of a Jelly Belly Jelly Bean

Speaking of munchies..... I couldn't bring myself to post earlier because I knew I'd have to admit aloud to myself what I'd done last night and admitting it was going to make it real. I was feeling bored, ok yes bored, last night watching tv, and for once I couldn't quieten the munchie monster. I ate some cold meat, but that didn't satisfy. What I should've done was to wander up to bed ... but I didn't do that. Instead I found myself on the top shelf in our pantry (on a chair, not actually up there!) where the kids candy is kept. There I found a considerably large bag of jelly belly jelly beans (it wasn't lost, somewhere in the recesses of my mind I knew it was there). I thought to myself, I could just eat a couple .... (ok so I didn't think!) .....well about 20 minutes later, there was way more than a just couple of jelly beans dancing in my jelly belly, I had to walk over to the trash and pour the remainder in. I couldn't trust myself to just put the candy away. I had eaten almost 1/2 the bag! Mindless eating. And now I felt I drank lots of water before I climbed into bed. I woke during the night with a dry mouth (like a hangover) and drank more water.

Today I am up to 173lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!! I just about died seeing that on the scales this morning. I did not want to come online and tell anyone. I did not eat that many jelly beans. My mind has been torturing me all day, telling me I have failed yet again, cannot trust myself etc. And talk about cravings today!!!! I know I am going to have to satisfy the fat and protein demands of my body and get myself back into ketosis. I am NOT going to let this stop me for getting to my goal weight. I have come so far. HELP!

So for me, August 1st, my new start weight is 173lbs. My goal is to get into the 150s. To get there by the end of August, my minimum loss will need to be 14lbs.

Incidentally, I was thinking today while I was driving. I've spent hours looking at labels and not eating such and such because it has say 5g carbs, or 8g carbs. I wish I had done that instead. I really think that for me personally I need to figure out some carbs I can do that are ok for future reference. NOT JELLY BELLY JELLY BEANS though! I got this info from a Jelly Belly site online: Question: How many calories and carbohydrates are in a single Jelly Belly jelly bean? Answer: There are 4 calories per bean, or about 100 calories per single serving (25 beans). They have approximately 1 gram of carbohydrate per bean and zero fat. Jelly Belly jelly beans offer a satisfying burst of flavor for a modest calorie investment. They are also certified Kosher. (well that makes me feel so much better. 1g per bean! NOT!)